Divorce is a slow process, but finalising a divorce can still come as a shock. After the split, the decision to divorce and the legal process, it is important and healthy to mark the moment when you are legally no longer married and put plans in place for moving forward.
Accept your divorce
Even if you wanted the divorce, accepting it can be difficult. Acceptance is the most important step to moving on to a happy and fulfilled life after your divorce. When your divorce comes through, ensure you take a moment to really accept what has happened and that you are now officially starting the next stage in your life.
Take a look at your finances
You should now have a very clear picture of your financial situation. Spend a morning or afternoon with your bank statements and a calculator and work out how much money you need to live and check that you are bringing in more than is going out.
You don’t want to start your single life getting into deep debt. Be realistic about your outgoings and your income. If things aren’t adding up, look at what outgoings you can reduce. If things still don’t add up, take some measures to balance the books. Find out if you are eligible for any benefits, if you are struggling, speak to your local Citizens Advice.
Have a moment of celebration
You may not feel like celebrating, but try to do something to celebrate how far you have come from when you first split up with your ex to where you are now. Find a good friend or two to do something with to celebrate the beginning of your new life.
Decide on your priorities
Now you are single, you have an opportunity to be completely selfish and do whatever it is you want to do. Decide on your long term priorities and life goals. Start taking small steps towards that goal. It may be unrealistic now to fulfil your goal of travelling the world solo, but you may be able to set up a savings account for it and start looking for ways to work remotely. Having a clear goal for the future will help you to move on.
Meet with your divorce lawyer
Although the divorce is now done and dusted, find the time to meet with your divorce lawyer to ensure you are fully aware of your rights and what may affect any maintenance payments. This can save you problems down the line when both you and your ex start to move forwards and your situations change.