Every divorce that we see at Grant Stephens Family Law in Cardiff has a different story attached to it. Some people have been married for decades, some for a few years. Some people want the divorce, others don’t. For some people the divorce was a shock, for others it has been years in the making. A divorce is always an emotional time, no matter what your circumstances, which is why we do our best to make the legal process as smooth as possible for you. However, it is important to remember that once you have finalised your divorce and signed the final papers that your life will continue and it is only going to get better. Here is a quick guide to your life after a divorce:
It’s fine to mourn
Do not feel pressurised into moving on too quickly. A divorce is a big upheaval in your life and you need to give yourself time to process the change and mourn for what you have lost. It is natural to feel saddened, no matter what your circumstances. Before diving into a whole new life give yourself a chance to process your change.
Get the basics right
Couples often share different duties, not always evenly, but there will have been some degree of shared responsibility in your marriage. Before worrying about whether you should or should not be signing up to a new yoga class make sure you are capable of the day-to-day living tasks. Anything from earning enough money, to budgeting, to doing the weekly shop, to cooking meals to putting the right bins out on the right day can come as a shock to the system if it is not something that you aren’t used to doing. You are bound to make mistakes, but these can all be treated as your learning curve. Do not dwell on the fact that you got ripped off at the mechanics, or forgot about a parents evening at school. Once you have mastered functioning solo you will feel more confident in every aspect of your life. Ask friends and family for help if there are things that you are unsure of until you get to grips with all the little details that make up life.
Learn about you
A marriage is all about being a couple. It will have taken some adjustment to becoming a couple and it takes some adjustment to being single. It can be overwhelming at first, but take the time to restart old hobbies, catch up with old friends, cook what you want to eat and feel comfortable in your own skin. Being single does not mean being lonely, your social groups will help you to find yourself as a single person.
Start to explore
Once you feel on top and in control start to explore what the world has to offer you. Look at new hobbies, a new career, further training and going on dates. You don’t have to commit years of your life, but looking around to see your options is a great healing process. It will give you aspirations and confidence to build a new life for yourself.
All these things will help you to come to terms with your marriage and divorce and to start a new chapter of your life.