Once you and your spouse have come to the unanimous decision about filing for a divorce, you may feel like the hard part is over. However, you will then have to tell friends, family and colleagues. This can be both daunting and challenging and how and when you tell people can affect your relationship with them as you move forward.
As divorce solicitors in Cardiff we often support clients and advise them on how to break the news to their loved ones, it is never an easy process.
If you have children it is imperative that you and preferably your spouse as well sit down and tell them before they hear it from anyone else. This way you can reassure them and answer any of their questions in an age-appropriate manner.
You will then need to work out in what order to inform others close to you. Don’t be afraid to sit down and write a list of who you need to tell. Work out if anyone will be offended if they hear the news second-hand and who you need with you to support you.
Many of your friends and family will have invested in your marriage in some way, whether financially, assisting with your wedding, baby sitting or helping you move home. It is important to to undervalue people’s emotions if they are hurt or upset by the news.
How you tell people will depend on your relationship with them. Some people will be content with little detail and respect your privacy. Others will want to know everything, especially if the news will come as a shock to them.
It is important to only tell detail to those who you trust 100% to be on your side and not spread gossip. You don’t want to find out that your innermost secrets and emotions are being casually discussed in the school playground or at dinner parties.
When you tell people keep all emotion out of what you say and deliver them with the facts along with what you plan to do moving forward. Plan what you are going to say, so you don’t end up revealing too much and avoid the blame game.
Whatever you do during your divorce keep things off social media. This can come back to haunt you and end up damaging your future.
It isn’t easy telling people about your divorce, but you will be overwhelmed with support from people who can help you once they know about your situation.