It doesn’t matter how much time it takes after your divorce for your ex to remarry, you will experience some confusing emotions that may take you by surprise.
You may be hit with some strong emotions even though you considered yourself fully over the relationship, or it may be the trigger that means you finally draw the line under your divorce and can move on. Whatever happens, it is perfectly normal to react in some way to the news that the person you once walked down the aisle with is doing it again with someone else.
Concern for your children
Even if your ex and their new partner have been together for some time, marriage is a whole new experience that will instantly make you concerned for the well-being of your children.
You may feel that your position as a parent is threatened, or fear that your children will be put through another divorce in a year or two. It is also reasonable to worry about how the marriage will affect your children financially, both ongoing and for inheritance.
If you have serious concerns about your children it is vital you seek help from a specialist family lawyer. Please contact us for advice.
Betrayal
The vast majority of people take their marriage vows very seriously and don’t enter into a marriage thinking about divorce. Therefore, it can still feel like a betrayal when your ex remarries after your divorce. You may feel nothing towards them anymore and may now be living a wonderful life, but betrayal can still creep in when you remember the broken promises and think back to your wedding day.
If you do feel betrayed, talk about it and air your feelings with close friends, rather than bottling it up, so you can understand why you feel the way you do.
Relief
For some people, knowing that their ex is now married to someone else can bring a huge sense of relief. This can be because the new marriage feels like the final stage of your divorce, allowing you to feel like you can finally move on, or it can be a relief of any guilt you feel over the divorce, knowing that your ex is now happy.
Cynical
If you know your ex well and have something of a low opinion about them, then news of the wedding may bring about a large wave of cynicism, mixed with pity for their new spouse. You may see history repeating itself and even if you are an optimistic person, you may not give the new marriage much time.
Proud
The new marriage may take you by surprise and it may not upset you at all, leaving you feeling proud at how far you have come since the dark days of your divorce.