How to successfully divorce in middle age

Divorce is something that can happen at any age and each age group has its own problems to work through. When you divorce in middle age, as opposed to being younger, then there are several factors to consider to ensure your divorce is a success.

Financial complications

The longer you are together, the more entwined your finances will be. Throughout your lives together there will have been times when each of you was earning different amounts and sometimes one person not working at all.

You will also have accrued assets that need splitting. Your other half may have savings accounts or other investments that you do not know about, or do not know the value of. Ensure you provide as much information as possible to your solicitor and be prepared for the process of unpicking your finances to take some time.

Pensions

Pensions are a contentious issue in divorce cases. They are considered a shared asset, so one person may end up splitting their pension with their ex for the foreseeable future. On the outset, this can seem unfair. However, in longer marriages, especially with children, it is very common for one person to sacrifice their career advancements in order to care for the family, thereby not being able to accrue their own pension.

Ensure your divorce solicitor negotiates a fair settlement for your pension, as this will make the world of difference in your later life.

Careers

If you have not been the main breadwinner during your marriage and have taken the role of supporting the family, you may suddenly find yourself having to earn more. In middle age it can be difficult to find a well paid job, if you have been out of the jobs market for a while. Be prepared for the process to be a long one, invest in some good careers advice, some training and ensure you take some advice on putting together a good CV.

Dating

You may want to start dating again. However, if you haven’t dated for many years, it can seem as if you have just landed on Mars. Internet dating has changed the way many people date. Don’t start by looking for love straight away, as this way you will soon become disheartened. Instead, approach it with the aim of having fun and meeting new people and something more may develop.

Adult children

You may presume that it is easier to divorce when your children are grown. However, you now have to face fully grown adults who may not be shy about expressing their opinions. At this stage in life you may also be faced with your children reaching their own milestones, such as getting married or having a baby. These events will plunge you and your ex back into close proximity. Be prepared for some emotional rollercoasters and for rising above your own emotions for the sake of peaceful family reunions.