How to cope with loneliness after a divorce

Splitting from a partner is always a shock, even when you knew that the divorce was coming. Your life after the divorce is bound to change in many different ways, but one of the worst things that can happen is that you end up feeling lonely.

Loneliness isn’t a trivial thing. It can lead to physical and mental health problems. Nor is loneliness just solitude. It is fine to crave solitude after a divorce, while you come to terms with it. However, when you feel lonely it is important that you take some steps to combat it.

When does loneliness strike?

You may not feel lonely all the time. It may be at certain times of day, such as coming home from work to an empty house, or when you get into bed at night.

Start trying to identify the times when you feel at your lowest and then you can take some measures to combat this.

For some people the feeling of loneliness can be continual. If you feel lonely for most of your waking day, then you need to make some more significant changes in your life.

Talk to someone

If you have no immediate friends or family that you can unload to, book yourself some counselling or group therapy. Simply talking to someone about what you are going through can make a whole world of difference to how you feel and can prepare you for the next stage in your life.

Take up group hobbies

It is very easy to still feel lonely in company, but group classes, hobbies or sports activities can distract you and provide welcome relief, if only for an hour or two. You won’t instantly gel with all new people you meet, but as you get to know more people, new opportunities will arise.

Find a coping mechanism

When you are suffering from loneliness, it is easy to resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Instead, you need to find ways to calm your mind that are healthy. Look into yoga, meditation or mindfulness. If you can’t afford any classes, there are lots of free tutorials on YouTube.

Make progress with the next stage of your life

Recognising that you are experiencing loneliness is the first step to improving your life. Although a divorce marks the end to one chapter of your life that you may not want to have closed, it also marks the start of a new chapter.

Accept that you are going through a bad patch and take some steps to improve it. Decide what it is you want from life and start to work towards your goal. It may only be baby steps to start with, but every destination starts with a journey.

Having a renewed purpose will help to get your life back on track and as you explore new paths you will start to meet new people to help alleviate your loneliness.